Contrary to the theme of this blog, I actually take a good day to unwind once on vacation*. The first night’s sleep is filled with anxiety-induced dreams, and waking up with a start regarding things I forgot to hand off or am worried about getting into trouble for if not done properly.
But those first night dreams result in me waking up too early (read: still drunk) and firing off a few emails addressed to Boss with rapid-fire CYA nuggets. Once this last burst of passive aggressiveness is off my mind, I drift off to “i don’t give a fuck” land, where I’m currently unpacking my bags as we speak.
* Opposed to post-vacation, where my schtick includes me strolling in, proclaiming, “so…. what it is that I do here?” I also like to answer my phone, then place my hand over the receiver and ask someone, “We sell pancake batter here, right?” I think the kids in the office laugh just like you do when Uncle Phil pulls that quarter from behind your ear.